What a chilling article. There goes my revolution! We must act!
We must make more men like mine.
Seriously. If my father wasn't dedicated to the idea of his daughters becoming economic sucesses - he stressed so often to me the importance of making money that I cannot conceive of being a stay-at-home mom. To me that would be 'unemployed', hence, unacceptable.
And then there's Brian. I know for a fact the percentage of time I spend on housework has gone down since marriage, not up. Brian doesn't see it as automatically my job. He doesn't begrudge me my natural slovenliness. I mean, isn't that amazing? I asked him if he would quit his job or go part-time if we had a kid, and he said 'yes'. So I wouldn't have to. I like being the breadwinner.
But I think another important piece is the talk of unrealistic, idealistic goals. Women are told that they can always opt out. Think of that. Of course work is stressful, it's not fun, the idea of spending all your time with kids is tempting - retirement while young, almost. Fun and family fulfillment. Whereas most men, like me, would see such 'unemployment' as a lack of power and social presence, becoming secondary and dependant.
We should honor care-givers more. We should spend more on child care and education. We should laud educators and caregivers with prestige and higher saleries. Then more men would do it. Er... I mean...
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Date: 2005-11-30 04:00 pm (UTC)We must make more men like mine.
Seriously. If my father wasn't dedicated to the idea of his daughters becoming economic sucesses - he stressed so often to me the importance of making money that I cannot conceive of being a stay-at-home mom. To me that would be 'unemployed', hence, unacceptable.
And then there's Brian. I know for a fact the percentage of time I spend on housework has gone down since marriage, not up. Brian doesn't see it as automatically my job. He doesn't begrudge me my natural slovenliness. I mean, isn't that amazing? I asked him if he would quit his job or go part-time if we had a kid, and he said 'yes'. So I wouldn't have to. I like being the breadwinner.
But I think another important piece is the talk of unrealistic, idealistic goals. Women are told that they can always opt out. Think of that. Of course work is stressful, it's not fun, the idea of spending all your time with kids is tempting - retirement while young, almost. Fun and family fulfillment. Whereas most men, like me, would see such 'unemployment' as a lack of power and social presence, becoming secondary and dependant.
We should honor care-givers more. We should spend more on child care and education. We should laud educators and caregivers with prestige and higher saleries. Then more men would do it. Er... I mean...